May 20, 2010

What Do Stay At Home Moms Do All Day?

Howdy howdy,

I haven't written in a while because I have been tending to the children and the laundry and the husband and the cookin'. And well I haven't really thought of anything good to say. But I have something really good to say now. And it's kind of a big deal.

It's what my lovely sister (who is a stay at home mom as well) and I call ordering your life. I mean it seems so easy. Just clean, cook, and make sure the kids are safe. It is super easy. What do those stay at home moms do anyway. Probably eat bon bons and watch soap operas and read trashy magazines. They fill their time with frivolous shopping expeditions complete with buying their kids designer clothes. Oh wait that's what SAHMoviestars do. Never mind.

The other day I was going to start a video documentary for my husband, just to show him a glimpse into my day. Also, I watched a similar video that his mother put together from when he was a toddler and it inspired me. (It was complete with a boy version of my daughter Davy emptying and climbing into the dishwasher.) I figured that would help my husband empathize with me when he got home from work. Unfortunately, all footage was lost due to an overzealous almost 2 year old using the FLIP. Darn it.

Anyways, our video camera casualties aside, being a stay at home mom is A LOT of work. I am embarrassed to say that sometimes I think to myself, maybe I should get a job, so that I can get a break. Seriously. Anyways. I still LOVE it despite the often insanity.

So a typical day sounds super boring to most and like it could not possibly take up a day. But a hungry newborn baby, a giggling terrible two year old and a house can surely give you a 70 hour + work week made up of physically and emotionally demanding tiny and large jobs. When it's hard, it's really hard. But when it's good, it's amazing and awe-inspiring. Having a newly 2 year old daughter look at you with her big brown eyes and long eye lashes and tell you that she is happy just sitting next to you. That is one of the best feelings yet. This could have been followed by emptying out the contents of my wallet and a few drawers in her reach...but there is always time for cleaning. And if there isn't well...I'm working on making some.

SO-Back to this ORDER business. It is very easy as a SAHM to react aimlessly to the situations around you. The kitchen is messy- clean it. Laundry is piling up-wash it. The child is dirty- clean her. The bed is unmade-make it. There is unrolled toilet paper all over the bathroom-darn it. Food finger painted on the walls- wipe them. This is how I have been doing it for the last year or so. Reacting. And usually all this reacting has me annoyed because I am trying to do about 27 things at the same time. Now this could be because of my ADD nature, but when I have 27 things I am already working on and one more that needs me right away. I get even more thrown off. So I am reading this book called A Mother's Rule. Rule as in a rule of life. The same kind of rule that religious orders follow. It is a little bit like a schedule or a routine but with a focus. It is more of a way of living. A Mother's Rule of Life is a way to get your priorities in order. You have to do some soul searching and figure out what you want. Pay attention to where your time is going. IT can be shocking. TV watching, Internet surfing, shopping, talking on the phone, cleaning the same room several times, eating bon bons and watching soap operas. Ok just kidding about the last one.
So I am in the process of making myself some kind of rule to follow.

A small snippet of my day today:
6:30AM -7:00AM Woke up after a not so sound night of sleep filled with newborn feedings. Then fed little cupcake of a baby mother's milk and changed her diaper.
7:30AM Joined 2 year old in the kitchen for some breakfast.
Made oatmeal, made fried eggs, made cinnamon toast, ate with the two year old
Cleaned up kitchen after breakfast
Dressed and changed two year old
8:30AM Talked to my mom about a MN trip that is not happening for me. :(
8:35AM Organized under the kitchen sink. This is where I....
Found 10 lbs of potatoes. hmmmm
9:00AM-12:00PMHere comes a little ADD, I guess I should say ADHD since ADD is now an expired term.
peeled and cooked 10 lbs. of potatoes with the intention of making frozen hash browns.
Cooked them 5 minutes too long until they were a little too soft.
Cut up celery, onions, boiled eggs.
Made potato salad and mashed potatoes.
12:00PM Ate lunch.
12:30PM Cleaned up after the cooking. Cleaned up after my 2 year old.
We listened to some music.
1:00PM My sister came over and played with the 2 year old and helped her take a nap by sleeping with her in her bed. (Whatever works.)
2:00PM I nursed the baby and did some bill paying online.
My sister held the baby while I took an afternoon shower.
2:30PM I nursed the baby again. The two year old woke up from the baby crying.
The two year old crawled into the bassinet and fell asleep.
I happened upon and entered an online contest to win a new flip camera after doing a google search for how to fix your FLIP camera.
3:30PM My sister left. My 2 year old woke up for good. I read the two year old books while I nursed.
4:00PM We went outside and watered the plants and played in the driveway.
5:00PM Did some laundry and swept the house.
6:00PM I made steak on the skillet with chili powder and agave sweetener marinade while the two year old rolled my rugs in the family room. weirdo.
I ate dinner with my two year old date Davy Marin because my regular dinner date already had a dinner date with WORK.
7:30PM I cleaned up after Davy and myself and held the baby.
I one-handed folded laundry with my two year old. She unfolded some laundry.
I put it away.
8:30PM I changed diapers and put PJs on the girls.
I made a bad parenting decision with my husband and when he got home at...
8:50PM
we loaded the girls in the car and went down the street to watch the last regular season episode of LOST at some friend's house.

This is a little bit of the day that I can remember.

So I am working on figuring out what goes on every day and making a systematic plan that corresponds with what I want out of life...

Love, faith, joy, and a lot of free time to spend with my wonderful tiny family.

I will let you know when I come up with that plan.

Some excellent resources for moms who are trying to stay organized and enjoy what truly matters...

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www.flylady.com

Simplify Your Life: 100 Ways to Slow Down and Enjoy the Things that Really Matter

One Thing At a Time: 100 Simple Ways to Live Clutter-Free Every Day

and what I cam currently reading...

Mother's Rule of Life

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+If you have any advice or good ideas to help me on this strange journey of SAHMotherhood, please share them.+

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