|You said poop. I'm telling.|
Anyway. I really think it's time that I give you a glimpse of some naughty things that Davy has done in the last year or so.
I have been meaning to blog about one after another. And I since I try not to be a Debbie Downer about the thrills of child rearing, I was hoping to group them all in one naughty post. So here it is.
Please do not let this discourage you if one day, you too, hope to rear your own small person. Most small persons are not this mischieveous.
I have heard a few mind altering stories of kids in my day and the naughty things they do. The ones where you just silently thank God you don't have a kid like that, then you simultaneously thank your Mother for knowing how to raise you to not behave like a wild animal. And then you have kids yourself. I was an excellent parent before I had kids.
Sometimes kids just do crazy things.
Like this. Davy walked into the living room, pulled down her pants then defecated on the rug. Then she stripped down to nothing. Then she put her feet in it. Then she played in it with her hands and smeared it all over the rug and floor.
In her defense, I was in the restroom and she was a mere 6 feet from the door of it. FYI: the time lapse was between 1-2 minutes. You may be asking yourself, why the playing and smearing of feces? Desperate for attention? Lack of adequate play dough? Your guess is as good as mine.
I had this really cute wall paper giraffe in Gianna's room, glued to the wall. Apparently Davy hated it, because she ripped off Mr. Giraffe's poor head and most of his neck and part his legs.
|If you look closely you can see her mind reeling with thoughts of destroying her nemesis, Mr. Giraffe|
|Poor Gianna. This is why we can't have nice things. Because your sister is crazy.|
One day as I was changing Gianna's diaper, she ganked the Desitin without me noticing and silently headed to Gianna's room and decided to paint a good portion of her crib bars with Desitin. And in case you were wondering what Desitin is...it stinks, it stains, and it goes on raw baby bottoms. And based on personal experience can be used as a full sunblock if you have no skin pigmentation or have some crazy burn scars that can't see the light.
|This is after I cleaned most of it up. I made her help me clean it up. Unfortunately, that was probably fun to her. She loves cleaning if she can use massive amounts of baby wipes. Who doesn't?|
One day, she pooped on the floor in my room. Put boots on her hands and feet, walked through the poop, with her hands and feet. Then she walked on all fours around the house and tracked her special delivery. After I regained my composure I attempted to re-clothe her. Then I was scolded by this naked + 4 booted 2 year old and was told that she could not get dressed, because, obviously, she was an elephant and elephants do not use the potty or wear clothes. Good to know. I'm always learning over here. I was pretty sure that was a one time, for the books, incident. A tale we would laugh at one day.
Oh wait. Then she did it again in her room in the closet. Same nakedness. Same cleaned up 4 boots on hands and feet. Different defecation. All over the house.
I know what you are thinking. Bad parenting. And you're probably right. This pooping on the floor incident may or may not have been related to the conversation Davy and Daddy had the previous day concerning where animals use the restroom. She found it quite amusing that they do not use the potty. Pooping for the sake of imaginative play. Hmmm...this story reminds me of a small boy who was found in his crib with a dump truck and his own dump in it. Perhaps it was her dear Daddy himself. Karma baby. Grandma C.-You hoped he would have kids just like himself... and he did!
|Mid- wall scribble. Complete with a stool. Where the h-e-double tooth picks was your mother?|
I guess I could tell you all about mysterious pools of yellow water we've found on the floor throughout the house, but I think that will fill it's own post.
And I'm terribly sorry I didn't photojournal any of the "use our home as a potty" shots. There is always next time. ;)